This is a picture of me, looking like I feel pretty. But the truth is, bloggers have self-confidence issues too. Also, we tend to only share the photos that make us look good. It can be easy to look to your closet for ways to “fix” yourself. It’s a something I think many of us struggle with. Lets peel back the curtain for a minute
Yesterday I had one of those days where I just felt seriously unattractive. For some reason, I struggle more with this in the fall and winter seasons. I think it’s easier to feel frumpy when you’re covered, head-to-toe in sweaters, boots and jackets, trying to stay warm and dry. Those things might sound fun to wear if you’re in a hot climate, but, day after day, it gets hard to coordinate them in a way that makes me feel good.
My soggy mood might also have something to do with the weather. October is normally a pretty brilliant month for weather in the PNW, averaging only about 3″ of rain. This year we’re past 8″ and the month is not over yet. Soggy to say the least!
As I struggled through outfit changes and restyling my hair during the day, I so badly wanted to run out and buy something to make me feel pretty. I erroneously thought buying something for my external self would solve the problems with my internal self. I was tempted to shop online, but I let the impulse pass. Even if I had bought something, it might have made me feel better for a moment, but the real issues would still be there because I wouldn’t have changed.
Instead, I re-directed myself throughout the day. Focused on the things in my life I love, and what I’m thankful for. I read some encouraging words, and reminded myself about my priorities.
Do you ever have days like these? If so, how do you handle them?
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Okay, about this outfit. One of my goals for this fall is to try and wear dresses a little more than I normally do in colder weather. I’m pretty pumped to say I wore this over the weekend, and I loved it. I think the key is in the tights. There are stuffy, dressy tights that say ‘swish-swish,’ and there are also cozy, fuzzy tights that say ‘I’m a cute Swedish snow bunny.’ When wearing tights with a dress, they can totally set the tone, in a direction you don’t want, if you’re not careful. I suppose the ‘swishy’ tights could work in a casual setting if they were played down with tennis shoes or flat boots.
These tights are well-worn and have fuzzy bits from the boots of years’ past, and I think they are just what I needed for this outfit.
[ Madelyn Wool Coat, c/o Only Child | dress, Everlane (s/o) | turtleneck, Everlane | tights, old (try these!) | boots, old (very similar) ]
xo,
Andrea
Even this warm-weather chick has day’s like these, my friend! I’m proud of and inspired by your commitment to dig into the root of your feelings instead of going for the quick fix. Here’s hoping you can channel that angsty energy into doing something nice for yourself (non-shopping related, of course!).
Thank you Erin! It’s so good to know I’m not the only one.
Good call about channeling that angst!!
Ha – my outfit today is not far off from this! (Brass chambray dress, black tights, tall cognac boots and a thick cocoon cardigan).
Personally, I tend to feel better and prettier all covered up. However, even if I love my outfit and my makeup, if my hair is bad (like today) that’s when I start to feel unattractive. As much as possible, I try to put these little flaws out of mind and think about what I do like about how I look. If that doesn’t work, I indulge in some favorite things – an extra cup of tea, a walk around the block, window shopping.
However, I’m with you on the weather! My coworker this morning said to me “it seems like it’s been dark for weeks already hasn’t it?” I couldn’t find a response because I’ve been trying to ignore it! The way I see it though, is we all have down days, and I think it’s inevitable, and also totally okay to feel that way sometimes.
Hey Stacy, I think you nailed my problem. It definitely has a lot to do with my hair. Ugh, the moisture in the air just makes it so limp! You have such nice hair, I can’t picture it ever looking bad! I love your tip about a cup of tea or a little walk, what a great idea!
I have the same dress, but have never thought to wear it in fall/winter. Thanks for the inspiration! Now to find my warm tights….
Good luck Emma! Maybe keep your eyes peeled for a wool-blend!
Yes, I have days like this. My go-to comforts vary. But, if I were smart, I would remember that a walk outside always has a way of settling my mind and providing perspective.
I love the outfit. I wore something similar last week in the rain. I’ll take wet tights over wet denim any day.
Wet tights over wet denim, great perspective!
And I love your idea about a walk outside for a perspective shift, so smart.
girl, don’t be silly, you are way too attractive to be feeling that way! you are a natural beauty and i imagine that you will age gracefully. your value is not in your appearance anyway. you are thoughtful and creative and people here love what you do!
YES! Preach it Michelle. My value is not in my appearance, thank you for the valuable reminder!!!! (And the kind words about me being a natural beauty too.) I hope your weekend is relaxing!
Love your outfit and yes, I have days like these more than I care to admit. My big thing is my hair. Since having kids, it’s gotten thinner, and it’s hard to even make it look decent (much less fabulous). I also always feel like I look tired (because I am!). I definitely shop sometimes to make myself feel better, but I try to realize, like you said, that it’s only a band-aid. If it’s any consolation, I always think you look gorgeous. :)
You are the kindest Lauren. And I agree 100% with all you said, that’s me too. Especially the hair. But we already talked about that! ;) Glad you are my friend. :)
I have those days like … all the time?! But I find more so when the weather is 90+ (I wear shorts and sandals every day, I’m sweaty and uncomfortable, hair a mess, blaaah!!)
Maybe I would feel the same in rain too, but we never get any to find out!!
Hang in sista. You are a beauty inside and out!
I wish I could share our rain with you!!!
Thank you for commiserating with me. And for the kind words!!
PS. You’re my ‘cool friend.’ ;)
Oh, heck yes, I do! I’m proud of you for resisting the urge to buy something shiny and new to ‘fix’ a bad day. And even more proud that you recognized that’s what was happening and that it wasn’t going to help.
I don’t mind the heavier clothes and covering up so much, but I find that losing the summer sunkissed color and drier weather (and super dry hair and skin) makes me feel blah. Mix that with less fresh air and sunshine and it’s easy to fall into those yuck days.
Hang in there, my beautiful, smart, and caring friend!