When it comes to my physical appearance I try not to complain about it too much. Even internally, I try to keep the dialogue generally positive, embracing my body as it is – big feet and all, postpartum body and all. I try to be thankful for how God made me, and thankful that I’m strong and healthy.
But my gratitude sort of ends when it comes to my hair. If you’ve read this blog for any amount of time, no doubt you’ve seen me through more than one hair color (blonde), more than one hairstyle (bangs) and you’ve probably been on the receiving end of some hair-related self-loathing. You see, I have baby fine hair texture and volume. It seems, no matter what I’ve done, my hair has always been flat and stringy. I have endlessly pursued the solution to this ‘problem.’
But finally I realized, my hair is not the problem. It was my approach.
A few months ago I did a 180 on my methods of hair care and styling. After being inspired by Natalie Born on Instagram, who talked about her air-dry method, I decided to give her approach a try. After I showered, I finger-combed my hair, parted it down the middle, and tucked it behind my ears to dry. I expected very little in return from my hair, and was shocked to find I liked the end result.
That was in July. Since then, I’ve refined my process a bit, and have gotten it down to a pretty good ‘science.’ I wash my hair every 4th day, which saves me loads of time in both showering and styling. But before I dive into the steps I take, I want to share a little bit more about why I made the switch.
WHY:
1 // My hair looks better. Without a doubt, this is the number one reason. Embracing my natural, slightly wavy texture means I am working with my hair instead of wrestling it into submission with a blow dryer and a flat iron.
2 // ‘Undone’ hair as a style choice. My friend Lindsey Kubly touched on this recently in her post about ‘messy’ hair. She included this quote – “You can always recognize a Parisian woman by her bedhead.” When putting myself together, I love a good outfit, a smart bag, and a flawless lip color. Opting for ‘undone’ hair instead of perfectly coiffed hair is a refreshing choice that keeps me from feeling ‘too done,’ or ‘too styled’ or heaven-forbid, ‘too-perfect.’ It makes me look and feel a little more effortless.
3 // Convenience. Less washing and styling means less time fussing over my hair. I can get ready so much faster. On the days I need to wash, if I have to be somewhere quickly, I’ll wash my hair the night before so it has time to dry.
4 // Healthier hair. In the long run, the less heat I use on my hair, the stronger and more resilient the individual strands are. This means less breakage and maybe even shinier hair.
BONUS: When traveling out of town, I never need to worry about a bulky hairdryer or straightener!
Now that you know the ‘why’ behind my hair choices, I want to give you a full breakdown on my process including the (many) hair products I use.
HOW:
I find I get three days out of this approach with most of the effort going into the first day.
Day 1
1 // Wash. I currently use the Signature One shampoo and conditioner by Kristin Ess. I have to use a lot of the shampoo to get my hair clean, but that might also be because by day 4 it has a lot of product in it. I like that the formulas are sulfate-free and the price point is easy on my wallet.
2 // Tuck and scrunch. Almost immediately after I get out of the shower, I part my hair down the middle (another hair style shift for me) with a wide tooth comb and and gently comb out any tangles. I tuck my hair tightly behind my ears, and spray the sections below my ears with a high-quality leave-in conditioner. This adds moisture back to my hair, which is key in bringing out natural curl or wave. Then I scrunch my hair from my ears down.
I have tried two methods of scrunching, one where I flip my head upside down and scrunch, and one where I scrunch it while it’s combed flat down my shoulders. I have found that the first method results in stringy, small waves, and the second method (which I prefer) produces bigger, more uniform looking waves. This step probably depends a lot on one’s hair texture. After scrunching, I let it be while it air dries on its own.
3 // Product. After my hair dries, I pull it out from behind my ears, and it has a nice bend in it that frames my face. The very next thing I do is add Kevin Murphy’s volumizing powder to some key spots. I usually lift a few sections of hair on either side of my part and sprinkle down a line of product on my roots, and then I repeat the process in one or two places on top/back of my head. The key to making volumizing powder work is rubbing it in. This adds a little texture and grit at the roots so the hair doesn’t lie so flat. Without this step, my overall hairstyle doesn’t work very well.
I usually finish out my day 1 hair with Kristin Ess’s texture spray (applied to the body of my hair) and light hairspray. Some days I do one or the other, some days I do both, it just depends.
4 // Dry shampoo. I am a huge fan of dry shampoo because it augments my volume and my ability to go longer between washes. On day 1, sometimes I add a little around the crown of my head if it still feels a little flat after the other products. At bedtime, I spray on a lot of dry shampoo and then toss my hair up on top of my head with a scrunchie in a loose pony tail. This helps keep some of the dry shampoo off my pillow and lends some extra bounce in the morning.
Because I go through dry shampoo pretty fast, I use two types, a less expensive one for at night, and one with a more refined formula for daytime.
Day 2
1 // Styling. After sleeping on my hair, it needs a little reviving to bring it back to life. On day 2 I heat up my curling wand (this is the one I use, in 1.25″ – .75″) and take a few sections on the sides and back to add a little wave and body back to my hair. I do this very quickly, and am careful to not curl all the hair, or I would loose the ‘undone’ look. Then I add a little more of the higher quality dry shampoo at the roots and call it good.
Day 3
1 // Options. On day 3, sometimes a light comb is all I need, and the waves from the day before remain. Sometimes my hair is a little bit dirtier from a workout, or just life in general. On these days, I opt for a cute hat, or (rarer), I will do a loose, low bun with interesting earrings. Anything that buys me another day without having to wash my hair makes me happy.
Day 4
Time to start all over again!
A week or so ago I ran out of time to air dry my hair, and decided to try my old styling methods of blowdrying it out, and using a bit of straightener. I had the worst hair day I’d had in ages! It was flat as a pancake, and I couldn’t wait to wash my hair again to bring some natural life back. I am so happy to have finally stopped fighting my hair, and to be working with it.
This post is not sponsored, but it does contain affiliate links. All products linked to are the exact products I use. :)
I’m currently growing my hair out a bit so I can go back to air-drying and styling. With short (well, short for me at least) hair I find that I have no choice but to heat style after each wash, and I can usually only make it two days between washes, even with dry shampoo. Do you find that when you wash after using dry shampoo that your hair doesn’t get as sudsy?
When my hair was longer previously, I would twist it in to ropes as it dried, but I may have to give the scrunching a try as it grows!
Yes! I think that is why I need so much shampoo when I wash. And I have found the same experience on length to be true too. When my hair is shorter, I have to style it every day. So annoying!
I have hair similar to yours (a little more oily – I wash it every day), and I found the Deva Curl Wave Maker has worked well for giving my hair a little extra body, if that’s ever something you’re looking for. I wash, comb, put in the product, scrunch and then air dry (unless it’s cold out, then I gently blow-dry my roots to keep my head warm), and it gives my hair nice waves all day.
My hair is oily for sure, that’s why I go through so much dry shampoo!! >< I think I will be definitely trying out this Deva Curl, it's been mentioned so many times already! Thanks for weighing in. :)
I have a big ‘ol cowlick in my bangs, but learning to part it in such a way that it gets weighed down made a huge difference. My hair is also thin and fine, and I’ve found that washing it regularly, especially in the front, and letting it air dry is all that needs to be done. But my hair is also very very straight, so I don’t have waves to style. With my hair as short as it is now, I literally just run some “surf hair” product through it and let it air dry.
What are your products of choice Leah?
Right now, I’m using The Body Shop Ginger Shampoo, whatever conditioner is around, and Garnier Fructis Surf Hair pomade, which I bought because I didn’t bring any on my last trip, but ended up liking a lot!
Hi Andrea, so happy to see this post. I also stumbled on this approach this summer. I have the same hair texture. I wash and condition with Fekkai products (very little fragrance is best for me) and his approach is also maybe more French, hands-off, “embrace the natural”.
I have been using them for years. Then I use a keristase mouse to encourage some waves. I wash every day because I work out and sweat too much to skip washes . But I don’t miss my hair dryer. My only con is that my hair takes a long time to air dry, so I worry about being out in public with wet hair (hello drowned rat). But maybe I just need to get over it? Do you find you wait for your hair to dry before going out?
Yes, the wait is the worst! In the summer it wasn’t bad, because as soon as I’d step outside in the heat, it would dry very fast. But lately, if I need it to be dry right away, I’ll wash the night before. I don’t like leaving with wet hair because then I have to finish styling my hair somewhere once it dries!
It’s SUCH a time saver to not wash your hair every day. I love going as long as possible, and the longer I go, the less I need to wash! I’m also trying to embrace my natural minimal curl, esp while we travel! You look beautiful my friend.
Thank you love!! And your hair allllways looks good!!
Agreed, when traveling the last thing I ever want to do is spend time on my hair. When I shower without shampooing, I can do it in like a minute! Add shampooing and conditioning and suddenly it’s like 15 minutes plus!!
I go for a week without washing and my hair is so much healthier. Andrea — who cuts your hair in Portland? I’m local so would be curious. Sounds like I have the same hair as you. Do you tend to layer the ends or keep it more blunt cut? Always a tension for me with fine hair. Thanks for this post!
Hi Ella! I just recently tried out a new person, and he really helped shape my hair into a shape that was good for my face – this was back in the spring, probably time to go again! I went to Shane at Ceremony on E. Burnside. As for the layers vs. blunt, it’s definitely a fine line to walk! When my hair is longer, a blunt cut doesn’t work because it’s too bottom heavy, so I opt for (light) layers. When it was shorter I had a more blunt edge to encourage fullness. Who do you go to??
I love your natural hair texture, it suits your face so well and looks so shiny. I have pretty much followed the same process with my hair as you describe here for years and it totally works. Only difference being I have a lot of hair even though the texture is fine and unless I wash my hair before 8 p.m, it’s not fully dry by morning. In the end, even semidry hair looks better than if I try and beat it into submission with hot tools. It doesn’t hold shape as well, either. I second the recommendation for Deva Curl styling cream. I use it while scrunching my hair and get a better texture and style in the morning but a little goes a long way. I will try tucking my hair behind my ears next time, who knew!. I usually use my flat iron on the front pieces to get that slight bend.
Thanks Magda, what a nice compliment! I agree, my hair holds its shape better in this state too. Any tips for applying the Deva Curl? How wet is your hair when you use it? Do you use the Wave Maker texture whip or something else?
I use the Deva Curl Styling Cream, it comes with a pump dispenser and smells like coconut (maybe all their products do?) I find it works best on hair that is damp but half dry so you can tell how much product is enough. I like my hair to feel like there’s no product in it and this stuff works well even when you use a small amount – a pea size rubbed in your palms applied anywhere you want texture is plenty. If it helps, my hair is oily (with dry ends) and pretty straight with a light wave which goes limp on day two. This product makes it last.
I’m always happy to hear when p[eople have given up the flat iron routine.
I’ve got thin fine curly hair. I never put a comb or brush to it and always air dry. I wash and condition with deva curl… sometimes I leave the conditioner in. I run my hands through my hair while putting in conditioner and that is my brushing. Once I get out I flip my head over and use a towel to snap againt my hair sort of like flicking it hard. I don’t squeeze the water out since that can add frizz. One I’ve flicked the towel a few times (still wet hair but not sopping) I scrunch with deva curl gel while head is again upside down. Flip hair up and use fingers to give myself a bit of a part. I also pick a few pieces around my face and sort of wind them together so they will frame my face how I want them to. Then I’m all done. 2 hrs later I stop looking like a wet rat, and shake my hair out a bit to get some extra volume.
Easy peasy.
So interesting to hear about your process! I feel like we need a community photo gallery for this post!! ><
So pretty! I have wavy, coarse hair. I have found and loved “Whisper Whip” (local to St. Louis, but on Amazon) and it is so great.
What’s the magic behind the middle part? Is it integral to the style? I have a long/thin face and find a middle part can exaggerate that.
I’m a fellow generous-foot person! I’m 5’3 and wear 9-9.5 after kids! Super stable, haha.
Team big feet! Definitely stable here too. As for the middle part, it looked really weird on me at first, but I like the symmetry it brings to my face. The other reason I love it, is that I don’t have to tuck my hair behind my ear anymore. My front top hair is kind of heavy, and I always had to tuck when I did the side part, and I prefer the look of un-tucked. Hope all that makes sense!
Love this post!!! My hair texture is also fine, with a little natural wave. Will be trying the ear tuck, as I love the framing curve… also pumped to try that volumizing powder!!!
Lately I’ve been washing my hair once (sometimes twice) a week… (if I’m wearing my bangs down I usually have to wash those every couple days), blow drying for a hot second, and then twisting my hair into a few buns for a couple hours, and then releasing and either finger combing the spiral, or letting it finish drying as is.
Salt spray the next few days to refresh my curls, and done.
I love a low maintenance hair style!!
I used to do the bun thing when my hair was longer! I have yet to try salt spray – might look into that! Thanks Kim! Let me know how the volumizing powder works for you.
I love air drying my hair for so many reasons, but I have not mastered it. Unless it’s a hot day, it takes forever for it to dry, and usually, my naturally straight hair ends up looking super greasy if I don’t blow dry – I may as well have not even shampooed. I also try to go at least a day between washes, but it usually ends up only being weekends when I skip. I feel so much better about how I look with clean hair, and being in an office every day makes me hyper aware of how I am presenting myself. If I wasn’t in an office, I’d definitely skip washes more frequently. I know the constant washing and heat styling isn’t great for my hair, but I’ve accepted that this is where I am right now!
I remember feeling that way about my hair when I worked in a office too. I felt super self-conscious about having work-appropriate hair. I don’t blame you at all. My hair tends to look greasy after air drying too, that is until I put some root powder and dry shampoo, that sort of ‘activates’ it.
This is my hair to a T!!! It has been so hard to embrace my “uninteresting” hair but finally my laziness and “over it” attitude have won over. Thank you for these product recommendations!
Did you see the comments about Diva Curl? I might try that next!
Thank you for this! I , too, have very fine, flat hair and I’m sick of having to “do it” every day! I love your tips and am going to give it a try!
I hope it works for you Stephanie! :)
I’ve been trying to cut back on how often I wash my hair, but if I go more than one day without a wash, my scalp will be suuuuuuuper itchy. Like, I can’t concentrate on anything, and NEED to clean it. Does this happen to anyone else?
Hmm, I wonder what the root cause is? Sounds like maybe something could be irritating your skin…
Do you use a shower cap? I don’t wash every day, but rinse in the shower and sometimes I think that makes my hair more greasy!
I don’t! I just put it in curled up bun in a scrunchie, and I wash my face before I get in the shower so my head doesn’t get wet.
I’ve been an air-dryer for most of my adult life, but I recently read that it may not be better than blow drying. I tried to look up the article (I think it was on Self, Allure, or Glamour), but couldn’t find it. The gist for the blow drying argument was that your hair has more elasticity when wet and thus is more prone to breakage, so you want to remove water as quickly as possible after washing. The article didn’t change my mind–I still air dry. Anyway, the reason I started this message was to suggest this dry shampoo: https://www.randco.com/badlands-dry-shampoo-paste.html. It’s not cheap, but its amazing and gives you that natural, California surfer-babe look without the beach or the effort. It’s a bit heavy, but a little goes a long way and it’s a paste so you can apply just where needed and without fear of breathing in whatever chemicals are in aerosol dry shampoos.
How intriguing! On both parts. I could see that about blowdrying. But gosh, the heat! How well does the dry shampoo absorb oil?I’m super curious about it! I have the Styling Paste by R+Co, and it’s really nice. I would be curious to try another product from them!
I didn’t buy into the breakage argument too much. I have breakage whether I air or heat dry. The R&Co Badlands paste is like a paper towel to oil: sops it right up. It does make your hair feel like it has product in it, however, but more like you spent a day at the beach: its got grit but isn’t sticky or cakey or crunchy. If you want your hair to feel just washed, this won’t be for you. It also might be too heavy if your natural hair has no weight to it. I have very fine hair but a lot of it, so sea salt and texturizing sprays do nothing to add volume because they are too light against the natural weight of my hair. R&Co holds up just as I need it. I feel like I’ve got the hair of a ’90s swimsuit model every time I use it. Another suggestion: get a silk (not satin) pillowcase to reduce the bedhead fuzz and the need to heat style on your second day.
I also struggle with my baby fine hair. Similar to what you said, I’m getting better at choosing to believe I’m beautiful except when it comes to my hair. I talk badly about it all the time (except I do brag that it dries super fast). Is it weird to say that having thin hair makes me feel small and insignificant sometimes? Anyway, this post got me thinking. And by the way, I always think your hair looks great!
Oh Karen, I relate more than I care to admit. Why IS it easier to accept everything else but hair? I think often for women, our hair (or lack thereof) is tied directly to how feminine or attractive we feel. I have definitely felt ‘less than’ because of my thin, not super attractive hair. I think I’m finally working toward accepting it as it is, and letting go of what I spent way too long hoping/forcing it to be, which of course didn’t work and always left me disappointed. So I’m reframing my expectations and perspective, and so far, that feels a lot better.
Thank you, thank you, thank you for writing this. I didn’t realize how much mental baggage I had been carrying around until I read this. Previously I had seen myself as “less than” for not styling my hair in a way that looks more photoshoot ready. I would only feel enough if I added loose curls or undone waves, which I rarely did, but always aspired to. Reading this post helped me to realize I can give myself permission to let go of those thoughts that don’t serve me when it comes to my hair. I am enough when I do things with intention, and do what works for me, not a fantasy version of me.
I’ve air-dried for years, and that works for me. I recently discovered if I put my long hair in a low bun (just twirling the hair around itself) while still a little damp, it will result in a wonderful loose curl for the body of my hair. Thanks to this post, I am starting to experiment with products right after washing to add more texture to roots and body.
Thank you for being an example I can follow to be more intentionally minimal in a hair care routine. It has helped me to let go of burdens I wasn’t aware I was carrying.
I saw you mention oily hair a few times in the comments. Have you considered conditioner washing? There are rules for what ingredients can’t be in the conditioner you use (basically anything too drying or that won’t wash out without shampoo — silicones, drying alcohols, and some other things), but once you make the transition, hair is much healthier without shampoo stripping oils and causing your scalp to overproduce more oil. If you’re on Facebook, the group Curly Girls! (Conditioner-Washing Group for Women) has tons of great info (and isn’t just for curly people).